Luvs2WatchAndBWatched: 60 doing 30
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Luvs2WatchAndBWatched welcomes you :
My Own Cognizance
I came into my own realization later than some.. I become aware of the nature of the desires I have had since I was 19. I'm 54 now. I discovered that I had dark need and cravings, All the while I lived in a vanilla world I was always on edge, be it in sport, with women or life in general, I needed to feel the rush or the high. After a while vanilla sex became boring and bland. After My last long term relationship, I finally came to terms with who and what I am, finding peace of mind once and for all.
I needed to know that there were others out there like myself, that I could relate to. So the search began. When I was 19 there was no such thing as the internet. Once discovered, however, realms were opened within my head, MY dark desires grew and flourished, I was able to identify and understand more about the lifestyle. I discovered I was a Top (bedroom dominant), which was something I had always known about Myself - but what of the thoughts and visions of women tied and bound that danced around in My head for so many decades? After finding several alternative lifestyle adult communities on line I joined this “ new “ World.
Several years in and I have had my run of fakers and attention whores and Dumbiants. Seems it's part of the territory while traversing to get where you're going, where you have discovered a true calling as a Dominant. Reading was one of the most important things that I did, while at the same time looking back in my past and finding out why I'm WIRED the way I am.
More to come.
A repetitive thought
Once a person has done the initial work in building a foundation, then and only then can they venture forth on the journey of a li is a journey not a destination. A woman’s submission is a treasured gift to be cherished to the last dying breath.
My recent adventures have taken me towards physical and mental submission, restriction, flogging, suspension bondage and sensation plays, among others...I am particularly interested in ..... Impact, and rope play.
Books now being read:
Erotic Bondage Handbook by Jay Wiseman
SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman
The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton & Janet W. Hardy (Joint Authors)
Screw the Roses, Send me the Thorns by Philip Miller and Molly Devon
Protocols: A Variety of Views: Power Exchange by Robert Rubel PhD
Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice by Robert Rubel PhD
Protocols: A Variety of Views: Power Exchange Books' by Robert RubelPhD